4 Reasons Hard Conversations are Worthwhile
When it comes to having tough conversations, do you tend to:
A) say the thing, kindly and unapologetically, and reach a mutually satisfying resolution
B) bottle up my feelings until I explode like a volcano of emotions
C) avoid having difficult conversations at all costs
D) all of the above, depending on the day
If you are A, please feel free to forward this message on to someone else who needs it more than you. If you are B, C, or D, please read on, as this message is for you.
What if having difficult conversations could actually be a good thing?
Relief from Internal Stress. Getting the damn thing off your chest allows you to be free from it. One of my coaches, Sarah Olin, says: “How do you prefer your pain? A few minutes of awful, or months and months of suffering?”
Checking Assumptions. I for one tend to create worst case scenario assumptions that have very little basis in reality. Yet when I share my assumption, I get a reality check about the story I’ve made up about the situation or the other person.
Honesty and Vulnerability Create Stronger Relationships. As scary as vulnerability can be, I find that it is a gateway to deeper connection. I have this wacky belief that my relationships are fragile, and may suddenly fall apart with one hard conversation. In actuality, having difficult conversations actually adds resiliency and strength to relationships.
Getting Needs Met. Unmet needs can lead us to view conversations as hard. The good news is that in owning and acknowledging our needs, we can create a path forward to meeting our needs. One of the most effective ways to get our needs met is simply to ask.
As always, I’d love to hear from you. What else have you found makes it worthwhile to have hard conversations?